How can you help a friend experiencing abuse?


How to be a supportive friend.

  • Never blame them for the abuse - abuse is never the victim’s fault
  • Tell them, “It’s not your fault," and "You don’t deserve to be hurt
  • Let them talk, don’t interrupt, and believe them
  • Call out the abusive behavior, but don't put down their dating partner. Your friend will likely get defensive and may not feel like you're a safe person to talk to in the future
  • Your friend may not be ready to leave their relationship, support their choices
  • Show your friend that you are a safe person to talk to and you'll support them with their decisions
  • Help them safety plan, and make sure they're safe
  • Suggest help and resources for your friend, such as the TAP808, the crisis text line 741-741, or other community resources.

Getting help isn't always easy.
But it's a lot easier knowing you don't have to do it alone.

Warning signs your friend may be in an abusive relationship.

  • Lower self esteem/depressed
  • Drastically changing their appearance/behavior
  • Stops hanging out with friends/family
  • Blames themselves for abuse
  • Social media presence changes
  • Attached to phone when not around partner; afraid to miss text/call
  • Paranoid
  • Sensitive to touch
  • Heavy makeup/long clothing to cover up
  • Makes excuses for dating partner
  • Slacking in responsibility (school, job, etc.)
  • Says they can't talk to/hang out with certain people because of their partner